Minggu, 18 Maret 2012

African Subjugation Part Three: The Six-Cent Birr Note

A couple months ago we went to this “resort” town Debre Libanos about fifty miles outside of Addis Ababa for the weekend. I woke up one morning, headed straight for the outhouse, and let loose. As I was wrapping up the session, I realized there was no toilet paper in the stall. The bowel movement was around a 7 on a 1-10 scale, with 1 being a sphincter-severing rock and 10 being pure liquid. This was not a scenario in which I could simply hike up my jeans and move along.

I quickly surveyed the stall. There was a wastebasket containing some disposed tissues, but they were flecked with blood. No one else was around, and the outhouse was far enough removed from the compound that yells for help would go unheard.

I generally bring a book with me to the commode, but this time had left it in my room in my haste.

It was then that I remembered I had a single birr note in my pocket, worth about six US cents.

Money is about the filthiest thing on the planet and birr rapidly disintegrates into cupcake paper, but this note was relatively clean and crisp. It was the clear option.

I hesitated. What could be more colonially haughty than wiping your ass with another country’s currency? The symbolism was brutally overt. Six cents, I kept saying to myself. Six cents.

What do you do?

Sabtu, 17 Maret 2012

The Wild Ride


With Duke's shocking loss clearing the path to the regional final in the South region, tonight's game against Baylor would be the biggest Colorado men's basketball win in fifty nine years.

Go Buffs!

Sabtu, 10 Maret 2012

Great Moments in Sportsfandom


Bussing forty minutes across the city to one of the two hotels in town with high-speed wifi, hunkering down in an abandoned lobby, fistpumping and nail-chomping your way through an improbable, gutwrenching playoff win from your favorite team on a grainy pirated feed while the staff looks on in confused amusment...then doing it all over again sixteen hours later.

I love Ethiopia.

I love Colorado.

Kamis, 08 Maret 2012

Two Months In

Some things I miss:
  • Seasons
  • Audio speakers
  • My own room
  • Lawns
  • Sushi
  • Poker


Some things I don't:

  • Red Meat
  • Clothes
  • My condo
  • Porn
  • Words With Friends
  • Drinking
  • Driving
  • TV

Rabu, 07 Maret 2012

February Top 15


15. Griffin House - Let My People Go
14. Wilco - Black Moon
13. The Beatles - Dear Prudence
12. Griffin House - Standing at the Station
11. Griffin House - Native

10. Griffin House - Gotta Get Out
9. Griffin House - She Likes Girls
8. Bob Dylan - Visions of Johanna
7. Griffin House - River City Lights
6. Loreena McKennitt - Skellig

5. Metric - Gimme Sympathy
4. Griffin House - If You Want To
3. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - Salvation
2. Griffin House - Just Another Guy

Song of the Month: Green Day - Welcome To Paradise

Senin, 05 Maret 2012

African Subjugation Part Two: The Equatorial Conundrum

Obviously southern (equatorial) civilizations lagged way behind northern "Western" civilizations economically and technologically heading into the twentieth century, which led to subjugation, which led to the backwards and broken societies we have today. What I don't understand exactly is how, when, and why the equatorial part of the world fell behind. The only explanation I've heard is that the colder weather of the North forced its peoples to develop the technology to combat the cold while simultaneously restricting them from depending on purely agrarian pursuits. Anyone who could shed some more light on this topic and/or recommend a book or other source of information would be greatly appreciated. Anthropology, geography, and history majors - we're looking at you.

Selasa, 28 Februari 2012

African Subjugation Part One: The Ethiopian Anomaly


Before we dig into international relations, let’s establish the curious circumstances surrounding Ethiopia. With the exception of South Africa, Ethiopia is arguably the most comprehensively unique country in Africa. Ethiopia is one of two African countries (the other being Liberia, which is quite another story) that retained sovereignty throughout the twentieth century. Ethiopia was occupied by Italy for five years preceding World War II, but has otherwise avoided imperialism. This is the prevailing theory as to why Ethiopians are so friendly towards foreigners (read: The White Man) – their experience with whites is not one of conquest and villainy.

With a population of 85 million, Ethiopia ranks second to Nigeria amongst African countries. The population growth rate is 3.2%, one of the highest figures in the world. Mass urban migration to the sprawling metropolis of Addis Ababa is rapidly changing the economy from one of agricultural domination to soft industrialization, though the majority of the people still belong to a strictly agrarian society.

Most interestingly, Ethiopia is the most populous landlocked country in the world. This is not an enviable position. Ethiopia is forced to trade through the Horn’s ports in Eritrea, Djibouti, and Somalia. This trying situation is made more problematic by jagged relations with Somalia and Eritrea, the latter which is more or less at war with Ethiopia. The products Ethiopia does export from the Horn – coffee, khat, and traditional fruits and vegetables – aren’t exactly golden egg-laying hens. There is little oil inside Ethiopia. Still, Ethiopia has the agricultural capability to export huge amounts of food to surrounding countries, and was even called a potential "breadbasket for Europe" by the New York Times if they could ever organize their agricultural industry. Ethiopia does have one intriguing 21st Century resource - water - but the surrounding need is not yet desperate.

This leaves Ethiopia as a large, rapidly expanding country with limited opportunity for economic refreshment. The people of Ethiopia are poor - almost all of them.

And this is where things get interesting. I was always under the impression that poverty and crime had a directly causal relationship, but Ethiopia has little crime and almost none of it is violent. Before coming out here I assumed that was because there were no weapons (false - AK-47s are more ubiquitous than wireless routers) or there was something distinctly unique about the culture, but I now believe the explanation is a little simpler. About a month ago, in a debate on the right to bear arms, a wise man told me his theory why Ethiopia has so little crime:

Because everyone is poor. The lack of an upper class eliminates potential conflict. It's not poverty that begets crime, it's the explicit gap between the upper and lower class. If there's nothing worth stealing, stealing's not worth it. Contrast this with the most violent places in America, cities like Los Angeles and St. Louis, and it becomes self-explanatory. There are a lot of reasons why crime isn't an issue here, but that's the most plausible.

Despite its sustained independence, Ethiopia certainly hasn't been immune to the vagaries of hegemony. I'll discuss more later - and explain why I can't right now.

Minggu, 19 Februari 2012

After Addis


In three weeks my commitment to the kindergarten will be complete, just in time for March Madness. However, I have the opportunity to stay here and work for another couple weeks. I think that I will. Although I do feel like I am helping the students, my reasons for staying are mostly egocentric. I have made a lot of progress but am nowhere near my destination. I have no idea if I will approach that place on this trip, but the longer I stay in Africa the closer I will get.

After those additional two weeks it seems sensible to travel somewhere else in Africa. I bought a one-way ticket here and have no certain commitments until the 2012 WSOP at the end of May, so all itineraries are on the table. Here are the current contenders in the order I first started considering them:


Egypt

Going to Egypt and checking out the Pyramids was the first travel impulse I got once I knew I’d be going to Africa. However, recent violence and instability has all but eliminated Egypt from consideration.

+ Crowds would be sparser than ever

+ There are no manmade objects on Earth I want to see more than the Pyramids

+ Logical, efficient stopover on the journey home

- Unstable and dangerous


America

+ Home in time for the premier five-TV ManCave event of the year: March Madness

+ I miss my dog and friends – though not as much as I expected to

+ Injuries to both my legs could use immediate medical attention

+ The sooner I get back to the land of high-speed internets, the sooner I can get started on pertinent life-projects

- Wasting the opportunity to see more of Africa and deepen the experience


Kilimanjaro

Climbing Kilimanjaro would be the sensible exclamation point to the East African experience. I have climbed mountains all my life and this would be the biggest.

+ My only real shot at one of the Seven Summits

+ The glaciers on Kilimanjaro are melting and will soon be gone. This could be my last chance to climb it before that happens.

+ My cardio is superb right now

- The injuries to my legs could render the climb impossible

- Expensive

- Tourist-central

- I don’t actually want to do this and wouldn’t expect to have a great time


Tanzania – Safari

The standard 29 year-old tourist itinerary for East Africa begins with a climb of Kilimanjaro and follows it up with a safari in Tanzania. Though I do really want to see some badass animals, I’m not sure I want to pay a bunch of money to do it in a controlled environment with a bunch of firenjes I’ve never met.

+ Animals!!

- Tourist-central

- Expensive


Ethiopia

I’ve been outside Addis Ababa for less than 48 hours since arriving here five and a half weeks ago, and that was just a weekend trip to a nearby town. Visiting Ethiopia without venturing outside of Addis would be like visiting Colorado without venturing outside of Denver. Ethiopia’s wonders include a valley that allegedly rivals the Grand Canyon, 15,000 foot mountains, legendary rock-hewn churches, ancient tribes, etc. There’s a lot I’d like to see in Ethiopia, but hope to snap a few off on upcoming weekends.

+ Proximate

+ Cheap

+ Encompassing Ethiopia, rounding out the experience

- Not as spectacular as other possibilities


Harar/Somaliland/Djibouti

Bussing east through Ethiopia, crossing into Somaliland, hitting the beach, and flying out of Djibouti is an intriguing way to wrap things up out here. Somaliland is not Somalia, but you do have to hire an armed guard to escort you throughout the country.

+ It’s in Somalia!

+ Unique

+ The beach

+ Highly recommended by Lonely Planet and others who have visited

- It’s in Somalia!

- Time-consuming


The Middle East

Jordan, Lebanon, Israel

+ This might be the closest I get to the most fascinating region in the world

- This is the sort of trip I should take with someone who knows the area


West Africa

Stopping somewhere like Ghana, Senegal, or Cameroon on the flight home would make some sense.

+ I might never get another chance to see West Africa

- Would be going alone

- No real connection to the rest of my experience other than being in the same continent


Singapore

A logical layover on a long flight home

+ A quick way to experience another totally unique culture

+ I’ve always wanted to see Singapore but may not be in the vicinity again anytime soon

- Only makes sense as a brief layover

- Expensive


Seychelles or Mauritius

Islands in the East Indian Ocean

+ The ultimate solo beach vacation

- Expensive

- Time spent there would likely be relatively unproductive


Uganda

It’s likely that I will head to Uganda at some point, either for a shorter visit or possibly a longer volunteer-based stay. Everyone I’ve talked to is very high on Uganda, particularly the town of Jinja on Lake Victoria.

+ Easily accessible via plane from Addis Ababa

+ Mature infrastructure

+ Animals!

+ Scenery

+ Lots of entertaining recreation


Sudan

This idea came out of nowhere when a travelling German couple we met at a restaurant told us it was the best place they had been to in eighteen months on the road. We would probably steer clear of South Sudan, likely staying north of Khartoum.

+ A totally unique, authentic, tourist-free experience

+ Cheap

- Sudan ranks 153/167 on the Democracy Index; check out the countries surrounding it

- Minimal research so far

- Extremely hot

- Minimal civilization/infrastructure if something goes wrong


Kenya

I had basically ruled Kenya out of the equation because the country is so corrupt and dangerous for foreigners, but an intriguing opportunity to spend some time in Nairobi and then go on a safari with a friend has emerged, and this is now the leading contender for the conclusion of the trip.

+ Animals!

+ Connects conveniently with Uganda

- Dangerous and corrupt

Minggu, 12 Februari 2012

My Life in Addis


My alarm goes off at 6:59. I dress and pack my bag. I wear the same thing every day – jeans, a t-shirt, a hoodie and tennis shoes. At this hour it is cold enough to see my breath, but it won’t be long before the piercing sun stirs the coals of the city and I shed the hoodie.

I go to the bathroom and take a leisurely #2 while reading. The first two weeks I pooped six times a day but now I’m back to my usual one or two. For breakfast I have a cup of tea along with banana bread or cookies that our chef, Asni, baked the day before. I continue to read or idly chat with housemates before brushing my teeth, filling my 2-liter water bottle 2/3 full of filtered water, and heading out.

Our house is located between a brothel masquerading as a bar and the Palestinian Embassy. A 19-year old Jew we call “The Kid” is staying at the house. Insert your own joke here.

I walk down a hill to the Tor Highluch bus station.

Tor Highluch is probably Torhai Loch; nobody knows or cares. Tor Highluch is a monstrous clusterfuck in the morning, and this will be the worst part of my day. The emissions of a hundred minibuses, fifty idling taxis, and a thousand passing cars mingle with the dust to create a thick, choking haze.

In Addis, cars do not depreciate; they only appreciate. The price of a gallon of gas – $4, the same as a generous meal in one of the city’s nicer restaurants – is not enough to dissuade the fire-breathing dragons of commerce.

Boarding this first minibus is an animalistic, vile, degrading experience. I stand on the curb until two dozen of us spot the Piazza bus. The half of us who fight the hardest, who attack the bus doors most aggressively, who sacrifice the most dignity will land the coveted seats. Later this same bus will hold as many as nineteen people, but passengers are limited to twelve under the “jurisdiction” of Tor Highluch. It will take eight times as long to load the bus this way, loading it before the exiting passengers have a chance to escape. Such are the inefficiencies of disorganization. On my hourlong commute to school, I will see hundreds of hungry Habesha, dozens of destitute orphans and a multitude of amputee beggars, but it is the legislative failure of Tor Highluch that perturbs me the most because it would be so easy to fix. When people are made to behave like animals, forced to push each other aside to feed at the trough of transportation, it undermines their civility as humans. However, this is the only ignoble activity that I will witness or take part in during the day, and the only one of my four minibus rides that will present any sort of difficulty.

It will take between zero and thirty minutes for me to board a minibus. The longer it takes, the more upset I get with myself for not scrapping harder to get on the last one. Once boarded, the bus will travel northeast through the city to Piazza, one of the city’s several commercial hubs. I was transfixed by the minibus experience the first two weeks here, eyes glued to the window so I could see every treacherous move the driver made, every store on the street, every Habesha interaction. I was also enraptured with the smells – eucalyptus, goats, manure, body odor, and spicy berbere - intoxicating but fleeting, usually choked off by burning gasoline within a few seconds.

But now it’s all the same, and I usually just read my book. Piazza isn’t that far away, but it takes twenty-five strident minutes to get there in rush hour. On the day I will ride four minibuses across the city. Each will cost 2.70 birr, a total of 10.80, equal to about seventy cents.

Though it is the commercial center of East Africa, Addis is basically a giant shanty town. No one really knows how many people live here; estimates range from 2 to 9 million, depending on what you count as city. It's unfair to generalize so many people - you can find every financial sector here - but the majority of the city's residents are somewhere between poor and destitute. But it is not an unhappy place.

Piazza is alive in the morning. Piazza probably never dies, but I’ve never been out after midnight. I walk four minutes through the shops, stands, and throngs to where the Kechene minibuses load. Getting on a Kechene bus is stress-free, and twelve minutes later I will weraj at the Medianhealem Church.

I then walk seven minutes up this hill.

I often stop for a moment to chat with a boy who washes cars named Taigen. Many Habesha will engage me in conversation throughout the day. The desperate and uneducated just yell things in Amharic, which serves no purpose and deserves no reply. Sometimes children just hold out a palm and ask for money; I’ve found the best response here is just to turn it on its head and reply “money?” as if they are offering it to me – if they get the joke, they laugh, if not, they usually walk away puzzled. It works either way.

Some offer a friendly greeting which I will reciprocate, but that is the limit of my Amharic and their English. And roughly once a day, a Habesha who speaks fluently will talk to me for several minutes. The majority of the time, this exchange is purely innocuous. Unlike Morocco, where almost everyone who spoke English to firenjes did so from financial motivation, most Habesha who do so are genuinely interested in genial conversation, friendship, erudition, or just practicing their English. I have several Habesha friends I’ve met in this manner, including Taigen.

I turn right on a cobblestone/dirt road,

gaze at a local dog who reminds me of Bailey for a moment,

take in this vista along with a few deep breaths of cleaner, elevated air,

and walk into the IEICA school. I arrive between 8:40 and 9.

I am immediately, adoringly swarmed by a gaggle of 4-6 year-olds. After a series of hugs, kisses, and high-fives, I exchange three-step handshakes and greetings with the faculty in a mix of English and Amharic.

The student-faculty ratio at our school is surprisingly small. There are about 25 students in two classes, KG1 and KG2. There is a principal, three full-time teachers, two full-time guards, one cook/cleaning lady, one cool young dude whose role is still unclear to me, one wise old man who just kinda shows up around lunchtime, frequent and arbitrary visitors, and me.

The kids play for a bit as everyone arrives. Around 9, Ficulta, the female teacher/disciplinarian, raises the Ethiopian flag while the kids sing the national anthem.

Then it’s time for class.

Both KG1 and KG2 have English, Math, and Amharic every day along with a sprinkling of art, science, and music. Math became my favorite once I learned the Amharic numbers. It is easier for me to communicate in arithmetic than it is in English, which the kids (especially KG1) know so little. Ficulta does not speak English, so I assist Asrat and Mulugeta in their classes. They are passionate teachers. I learn greatly from watching them conduct class, even though most of it is in Amharic. Asrat’s style is expressive and playful, while Mulugeta is more composed and methodical. Asrat is in university studying education. Mulugeta is in his last semester at the school and will soon be an accountant.

My role in class is an amalgamation of teaching, assisting, sitting at a desk and watching attentively, checking classwork and homework, sharpening pencils, and keeping kids on task.

After two half-hour morning classes comes the dreaded two-hour recess.

There is always a soccer game which Mulugeta, Asrat and I often join. Sometimes I play monkey in the middle with a few kids, sometimes I play on the slide, lift the kids up to do chin-ups, or just hang out in the cacophony. Lately I have been tutoring groups or individuals more, which has made recess shorter and more worthwhile. When the lunch buzzer mercifully rings around 12:20, I am hungry and tired.

Lunch is the most important facet of IEICA. Many of the students don’t eat breakfast, and some won’t get dinner either. Half-days end with lunch, and I get the feeling the tertiary faculty is there for the meal. Around forty former students who now attend the government school will arrive for lunch as well. We hand out the meal in an assembly-line, then eat our own share.

Four days a week we eat a bowl of rice, usually with potatoes and cabbage. It’s always filling. Once every week or two we have injera. Lunch winds down into a halfhearted naptime, followed by another, shorter recess. During this time I will usually end up discussing American, Ethiopian, and world affairs with Asrat and/or an old man named Meksala. I feel this reciprocal period of teaching is just as important as the classes with the students.

Around 1:50 the afternoon classes start, three and a half hours after the morning session ended. After this pair of classes the flag is lowered, the kids kiss goodbye, and I walk back down the hill and catch a bus to Piazza. The weather is the same every day – cloudless, 78 degrees with an occasional breeze. Though the temperature isn’t extreme, the intensity of the sun is ferocious. The equatorial proximity along with the 8,000 foot altitude create a brand of sunshine I have never experienced before, an enrapturing warmth that penetrates every pore of your body. To my amazement, most Habesha spend the entire day clothed in pants and an overcoat of some sort.

My immediate goal is usually to dissipate a couple hours before heading home. The Cherokee House is a frenzy at this point in the afternoon, and there is nothing I can do there in peace other than a 20-minute workout mashup of pushups, situps, jumping, wallsits, and tae-bo I developed a couple weeks in. So usually I hang around Piazza for a while, stopping in a café for a while and reading, checking email and CU Buffs basketball scores in primitive internet cafes, or just walking around and getting slightly lost.

Eventually I find my way to the final bus stop of the day down by this mosque.

I am rather well-liked at the house and will be greeted warmly upon return. The social situation was awkward the first week here, but now we have a merry community which satisfies my desires for companionship. Sadly my three closest friends are leaving this weekend, and I will miss them dearly. I doubt if the house will be as enjoyable hereafter, but I do have many other Habesha and firenje friends throughout the city at this point. There are Korean Mondays, soccer Wednesdays and Ultimate Frisbee Thursdays. The worst case scenario – a dozen books and the third season of The Wire – is appealing as well.

Together we eat a delicious meal Asni prepared around 6:30, then play Settlers of Catan or shoot the shit for a while before retiring to our quarters.

Early on, the sleeping situation was rather dire as I was needlessly sharing a room with another guy, then two other guys, and an excruciatingly irritating water pump located fifteen feet from the bedroom was haunting my every waking and fitfully sleeping hour. But we neutralized the pump by turning it off at night and then I moved into an empty room on the second floor, and now I sleep peacefully every night. There is a hole in one of the windows making the room feel as if it is partially outside, which I enjoy. During the night the temperature will slip into the low 50s or high 40s, so I sleep under my blanket in shorts, a t-shirt, and socks. I usually sleep hard for seven hours and change, then wake up rested and tired.

It may sound as if I have described a disgruntled existence in Addis, but that is not the case. Life is not particularly entertaining, but the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. I have a hard time explaining why I am happier here than I have been in Boulder for most of the last year. I suppose it is the balance. I have put great emphasis on balance for many years, yet it has always remained elusive. Somehow I have fount that equilibrium here in Africa. I am satisfied by my work, my social life and my athletic pursuits. I get to play lots of games, learn new things, and constantly improve myself. Upward mobility is part of everyday life. The only thing missing is romance, though I do meet new people all the time. It doesn’t matter; that part of me is currently comatose. I am not ready for Her arrival; searching would serve no purpose. Eventually that part of me will return. When it does, I will be deserving of the sort of companion I have long envisioned.

Jumat, 10 Februari 2012

January Top 15


15. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Brendan's Death Song
14. Smashing Pumpkins - Melon Collie And The Infinite Sadness
13. Whiskeytown - Dreams
12. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Dance, Dance, Dance
11. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Monarchy of Roses

10. Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros - 40 Day Dream
9. Madonna - Hung Up
8. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Ethiopia
7. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Meet Me At The Corner
6. Smashing Pumpkins - Where Boys Fear To Tread

5. Augustana - Shot In The Dark
4. David Gray - Babylon
3. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Desecration Smile
2. Matchbox Twenty - The Difference

Song of the Month: Smashing Pumpkins - Bodies

Minggu, 05 Februari 2012

Super Bowl Pick


Really Like:
Patriots -2.5 over Giants


Championship Round:

Liked:
Ravens +7 over PATRIOTS $
NINERS -2.5 over Giants X


Divisional Round:

Really Liked:
NINERS +3.5 over Saints $

Was Forced To Choose:
RAVENS -7.5 over Texans X
PATRIOTS -13.5 over Broncos $
PACKERS -7.5 over Giants X

Lock season record: 0-0
Really like season record: 6-4
Like season record: 29-32-2
If forced to choose season record: 98-93-2
All games season record: 133-129-4

Rabu, 01 Februari 2012

Learning To Learn

For some reason, perhaps because I erroneously heard it was the national language (perhaps because it is the only language spoken at universities), or maybe because I knew the kindergarteners I’d be teaching had English class, I was under the impression that Ethiopian people generally spoke English, many as a first language.

Lol.

Over eighty languages are spoken in Ethiopia, but the only relevant ones in Addis Ababa are Amharic, English (a distant second), Italian (a distant third), and a rising fourth which I will get into in a later series of blogs. Amharic is the language here. A few Addis Ababans speak English fluently (none without a powerful accent), a sprinkling can slowly but comfortably engage in half-broken conversation kind of like I speak Spanish, many know a few words, and the majority of the population speaks no English.

There are 8-11 adults who work or just hang out at the school I volunteer at. Four speak English well enough to regularly converse with me and the others know little more than good morning, how are you, etc. The 4 to 6 year-old students know the letters of the alphabet, numbers up to 10, some colors, a few words like “cat” and “ice cream”, and not much else. I cannot hold a conversation with any of them and I cannot speak any whole sentences and expect them to comprehend what I’m saying.

Amharic is nothing like English or other Western languages. Amharic has its own alphabet with 217 different characters, or seven versions of 31 different letters. Every syllable has its own letter. “Sa”, “say”, “seh”, “see”, “sih”, “so”, “su”, the syllables you can make starting with the “s” sound, each have their own slightly-different iteration of the root letter. The kicker is that Amharic has several syllables completely alien to English pronunciation. I work at a school in the “Kechene” neighborhood, but “Kechene” is just a made-up word that approximates an Amharic word that is literally impossible for me to write or sound-out without speaking. The first two syllables of the word involve making sounds that English speakers have never made in their lives. Other than briefly trying and failing to roll my “rr”s in Spanish class, I never imagined there might be syllables out there I’d never uttered before.

When I leave the house to go to school, I enter the Amharic world. The immediate goal every morning is to take two minibuses (more on the mesmerizing minibus system in later posts) across Addis Ababa to “Kechene.” Imagine trying to get from, say, San Francisco to Oakland, taking two buses, without knowing English or anyone who did. The first few times I tried were rather grievous affairs dependent on asking randoms one word destination questions, but then one of the housemates realized the Amharic letters scrawled on top of the minibuses might actually be cues to the locations the buses were headed. I found a commonality in one of the Amharic letters for the bus I needed, a “T”ish looking letter that’s like P in English. A few bus rides later I had managed to deduce the three-character word for “Piazza” written on all the minibuses headed there. Though it seems simple, this was a thrilling, confidence-building leap in my Amharic education. Actually boarding a Piazza bus is an entirely different matter, however, whose horrors will be better described in a future post.

School is exhaustively challenging. Teaching English to kids who don’t speak English without being able to speak their own language is an arduous process. I quickly realized drawing pictures was a precious intermediary, then realized I didn’t know how to capably draw many pictures on chalkboards, that I had a hard time differentiating between a rat and a cat, a cow and a dog.

Math was hopeless until I learned 1-30 in Amharic along with +, –, and =. Jumping through that hoop was another thrilling leap though, and now I feel legitimately useful teaching math.

I have to learn to draw, have to learn how to teach, have to learn Amharic, have to learn the kids’ names which is particularly trying because Amharic names don’t correspond to English ones. They’re all just random combinations of syllables to me.

It doesn’t end when school gets out. Navigating Addis Ababa can be rather enjoyable, but doing so proficiently is still a challenge. Just trying to order a juice and coffee together is a chore I’ve already failed to realize on two separate occasions. Ethiopians find it preposterous that someone could want to drink juice and coffee at the same time; I think passing up a delicious $.50 macchiato and $.80 fresh mango/avocado juice is more ludicrous.

If I want to play or watch a sport, it’s going to be soccer, a game I haven’t played since I was nine years old. I suck. I keep playing. I have to learn to play better. At home I have to learn how to live in a house with an array of young people I had never met twenty days ago, have to learn to sleep with earplugs and wake up at 7 (that actually came automatically at first, jetlag I guess, but I seem to be unlearning it).

I have never been forced to learn like this before. I had tremendous zeal for learning and memorizing things in elementary school and feasted upon the competitive aspects of schooling, even though my elementary school didn’t have grades. In middle school I realized I didn’t have to try very hard to get As, and in high school I realized I could get where I wanted to without expending much effort. The game switched from trying to know as many things as possible to trying to subsist on as little study as possible. There have been some intense learning experiences in my life (poker being the most obvious) but they were always born from amusement, never mandated.

Everything about the experience here is forced. I use that word to convey both its meanings: Many things are compulsory and quickly assimilated into my existence, without an alternative; other things are strained, uncomfortable but functional.

The other day, one of my housemates said something I found incredibly interesting: that she and her husband actively put themselves in uncomfortable situations to keep themselves mentally fit, to keep life challenging, to ensure their lives are always dynamic, never satiated. I was stupefied by this comment. For as long as I can remember I have been focused on efficiency, minimalism, making life as smooth and as graceful as possible. Yet somehow I wound up here, where little goes according to schedule and nothing comes without effort. Though there hasn't been any shortage of challenge in my life over the last nine months, I suppose I put myself in this position on purpose. Every day I seem to learn a little more about why I did that, and I hope to fully understand by the end of my stay here.

Jumat, 27 Januari 2012

Ethiopia is ____________.

Pick an adjective, any adjective. That's how life is, at one point of the day or another.

Go ahead. "Thrilling"? Sure. "Boring"? Absolutely. "Horrifying"? Definitely. "Beautiful"? Yes. Ethiopia is everything.

Rabu, 18 Januari 2012

Revelations

Before coming to Addis Ababa, I knew there would be aspects of the experience that I never could have expected or predicted. I read up on the place and the program, pored over the handbook and the cultural orientation guide, conversed with my friend and inspiration Alex, three-time visitor. Still, I knew I’d be stunned by a thing or two.

There have been many mild surprises, of course. The width and breadth of the poverty, for one. The ferocity of the bustle of the city. The sheer scope of giant Addis – much larger than I ever could have imagined. I’ll write about all of these things in future posts. But one largely unexpected thing has dominated life so far here:

Christianity.

I didn’t know it, but I signed up for Camp Jesus.

Alex mentioned that Cherokee had Christian inclinations, more so than they let on, but I never could have expected the Biblical onslaught that has characterized my first week here. God’s will is the reason the other firenjes are here. God’s name comes up every hour of every day and is often the focal point of the conversation or activity we’re engaged in. God’s inspiration created the schools my housemates and I volunteer at. God’s image dominates the streets, schools, stores, and homes of Addis. God’s worship is unquestioned, unswerving, unrelenting.

Ten days ago, the most important religious person in my life was probably Tim Tebow, so this environment has been rather startling.

Friday night I went to this “Small Group” God-praising thing at a nearby house, because a) my alternative option was to stay home and watch “The League” off a zip-drive on my computer and b) there are people staying at this house who I immediately felt a connection to, probably because they seem almost as passionate about games like Settlers of Catan as they do about Jesus. The evening started off with a round-the-circle introductory session where you stated your name, where you were from…and one way in which God had recently touched your life.

Gulp.

Within five seconds, however, I knew what I was going to say. When it got to me, I said I am not a religious person, but I really feel that God brought me here to Ethiopia.

And here’s the thing: it wasn’t bullshit.

I’m 29 years old. I don’t actually like traveling all that much. I live a healthy life in an awesome place. I have plenty of friends and an active social life. And for Godsakes, the NFL playoffs are still going on. Yet here I am in one of the most random places imaginable at one of the most random times possible. Every morning when I step out the gate, smell and hear the city breathing, and watch the people and goats shuffling up the streets of rock, I pause a moment and wonder how in the world I wound up here at this time, what chain of events led me to Addis freaking Ababa, and if I might be dreaming.

There is only one plausible explanation.

God.

Perhaps the word “God” doesn’t quite mean the same thing to me as it does to my housemates. I suppose when I think of the “God” that brought me here, I am just referring to a vague ethereal force that sporadically guides my decisionmaking process. But make no mistake about it – I was brought here. I really can’t connect the dots between “kinda wanting to do something to absolve my guilt about being a mediocre human being” and actually going to Ethiopia by myself for two months. I’m still not sure how that happened. A friend even bet me I wouldn’t get on the plane, then doubled the stakes contingent upon my staying here two weeks. Betting against me was probably the right play, but she didn’t realize she was betting against someone else too.

“God” didn’t just suddenly enter the picture when I stepped onto Ethiopian soil. “God” has been an important part of my life for many years. As long as I can remember, I’ve been a firm believer in things like Virtue, Karma, Judgment, Righteousness and Absolution. I frequently pray, sometimes meditate, often thank the Lord for opportunities. I climb high mountains because they bring me closer to God. I love it when someone says grace before supper. My housemates might think they’re making me uncomfortable doing so before every single meal; little do they know how much I appreciate it.

I am a religious person; I just have never defined myself as one, organized my beliefs into any sort of paradigm, or practiced them in a communal setting. My relationship with God has not been delineated and perhaps never will be. It is only here, in this pious land, amongst these zealous Christians, that I ever gave it much thought.

When I told my mom I was going to Ethiopia this winter, she gave me this book Cutting For Stone, a novel about medicine, Ethiopia, India, family, relationships, and of course, God. Recently, I was struck by a passage from the wise Matron of the Mission Hospital regarding the denominational differences between the Ethiopian masses and the Houston Baptists sponsoring the hospital, a quote that wholely encapsulates my perspective on religion in twenty-six words:

“God will judge us by what we did to relieve the suffering of our fellow human beings. I don’t think God cares what doctrine we embrace.”

Rabu, 11 Januari 2012

The Last Frontier

I am now in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, where I will work 2-3 months at a school for impoverished elementary school students. The program is run through Cherokee Gives Back, the nonprofit arm of a company that attempts to buy, repair, and then sell broken lands throughout the world. I will be working at the Kechene School in one of the poorest neighborhoods in town Monday through Friday, teaching English and other subjects along with some other basic service tasks.

Most people that I have told about the voyage are congratulatory, lauding me for choosing to spend my time helping others. Those who know me best, however, have been more questioning. They know that I am a self-centered person and that I perform no action without first carefully considering its effect on my own disposition. I am excited about the prospect of improving the lives of others, but more intrigued by how this experience can upgrade my own life.

For many years I have felt dissatisfied with my place in the universe. Generally I have blamed this frustration on failure in the two foci of my twenties: my career and my love life. Neither has brought any sort of long-term satisfaction, and I habitually blamed my discontent on the incompletion of these two quests. But the more time has passed, the more experience, aggravation, and triumph I’ve had in these pursuits, the more I’ve realized that it isn’t the alleged “failure” that’s made me disgruntled, it’s my own core soul that disgusts me.

I have plenty of regrets about my career in poker, but the greatest one is that I wasn’t able to fully comprehend and enjoy the considerable and consistent success that I had playing the game. It sickens me that I wasn’t able to appreciate the way I dominated the game for several years, simply because a few other guys out there were dominating it just a little harder. Now, separated from the game by circumstance, choice, and aptitude, it seems ridiculous that I couldn’t continuously smell the roses, that I managed to deceive myself into the belief that my performance was unacceptable merely because I never won a million bucks in one day. Now twelve years since I first started playing, I have observed poker from every vantage point. I understand how exceptional my skills were at the height of my powers, at the moment when the poker boom and my own passion for the game simultaneously, fortuitously climaxed together. I just wish I would have cherished it a little more, because satisfaction is so fleeting in this life.

I have not been in a ton of relationships, but feel like I have accumulated more relationship experience than I’d like to accrue in this lifetime. I’ve been in good relationships and bad ones, great relationships and terrible ones, casual and intimate, oppressor and oppressed, user and used, teacher and student. With all the time I’ve spent considering and acting out relationships, I am still miserably incompetent at them. In truth, “executing” relationships start to finish could be the thing I am worst at in this world. But every time I feel sorry for myself, every time I think of how much pain I’ve endured, I have to remind myself that I have inflicted just as much.

I am no closer to solving the riddles of my future than I was after that fateful week in April when I went from stable and comfortable to single and unemployed. Since then I have flirted with half a dozen different careers – writing, distilling, business, and game design, to name a few – while expending even more effort in the endless search for female companionship.

In 2011 I lost my identity. I had a hard time explaining to myself and others who I was and what I was doing with my life. Not only did that affect my perception in the eyes of others, but as the year wore on and the identity crisis deepened, it ultimately dismembered my self-perception as well. I slipped deeper and deeper into a confusing hole of darkness, surrounded by ghostly skeletons of past, present, and future. In the past I could at least fall back on my craft or my sovereignty; this year, I found myself clutching at shadows. Regaining that identity has to be my primary goal of 2012. Simply put, I need to figure out WTF I want to do with the rest of my life.

In June in Las Vegas my friend and fantasy football rival Alex Case, a veteran of the CGB program and the Kechene School, first told me about his experience in Ethiopia. Right away it sounded like the perfect scenario for me – warm, English-speaking, high-altitude, with little violent crime and the opportunity to teach elementary school. I knew right away I would soon be traveling to Ethiopia, if for no other reason than temporarily beating back the built-up angst I’ve accumulated on the poker circuit. I don’t believe poker is an ignoble profession, but there are many more humane things I could have done with the time.

I feel like this could be the last frontier in the journey to happiness. Lord knows I’ve tried everything else. I don’t expect Ethiopia to make me a happier person, but perhaps time here could provide the attitudinal adjustment necessary to a more contented future. At the very least, I should be able to find out if I want to pursue a career in teaching or social service.

More than anything else, though, I am hoping to escape my own self-obsession. Simply put, I am sick of thinking about ways to make myself happier, weary of considering relationships, tired of endlessly evaluating and writing about myself. It sure would be nice to think about something else for a while.

Minggu, 08 Januari 2012

December Top 15


15. Jeff Brinkman - Hope's Bench
14. Stereophonics - Roll Up And Shine
13. Queens of the Stone Age - Turnin' On The Screw
12. The Long Winters - Stupid
11. Chris Isaak - Heart Shaped World

10. The Verve - History
9. The Naked And Famous - Girls Like You
8. Collective Soul - December
7. The Raveonettes - The Christmas Song
6. Joy Division - Love Will Tear Us Apart

5. Glen Hansard - All The Way Down
4. Chris Isaak - Kings Of The Highway
3. The Black Keys - Lonely Boy
2. The Black Keys - Little Black Submarines

Song of the Month: Chris Isaak - Wicked Game

Jumat, 06 Januari 2012

Wildcard Picks



Like:

Lions +10.5 over SAINTS

If forced to choose:

Falcons +3 over GIANTS
TEXANS -4 over Bengals
BRONCOS +8 over Steelers

Lock season record: 0-0
Really like season record: 5-4
Like season record: 28-30-2
If forced to choose season record: 95-90-2
All games season record: 128-124-4

Rabu, 04 Januari 2012

2011 Song of the Year

5. Adele - Rolling In The Deep



4. Steve Earle - Feel Alright



3. Beach House - Zebra



2. Ryan Adams - Lucky Now



1. Nine Inch Nails - All The Love In The World

Selasa, 03 Januari 2012

Postseason Power Rankings


The Contenders
1. Green Bay (1)
2. New Orleans (2)
3. New England (3)
4. Baltimore (4)
5. Pittsburgh (5)
6. San Francisco (6)

The Sub-Contenders
7.
Atlanta (9)
8. New York Giants (7)
9. Detroit (10)

Too Little Too Late
10. Philadelphia (11)
11. San Diego (12)
12. Dallas (8)
13. New York Jets (13)
14. Miami (16)

The Backdoor Dogs
15. Houston (15)
16. Cincinnati (14)

Meh
17. Carolina (17)
18. Tennessee (18)
19. Seattle (19)
20. Oakland (20)
21. Kansas City (22)

The Anomaly
22. Denver (21)

The Best of the Bad
23. Buffalo (24)
24. Washington (23)
25. Arizona (25)
26. Chicago (26)
27. Minnesota (27)

The Really Bad
28. Jacksonville (28)
29. Cleveland (31)
30. Tampa Bay (29)
31. Indianapolis (31)
32. St. Louis (32)